NUMBER 958: PEE PEE GOTTA BE RIGHT!

Let me give all you wetbacks (illegal aliens), welfare hogs and whores and public assisted baby makers a bit of advice okay.  If you live in the once fine state of Florida, you need to pack up all them bags and gather up your paraphernalia and hook ‘em out of state as soon as you can ‘cause you gonna have HB353 on your hiney!

Oh, you don’t know what HB535 is?  So sorry!  You see, it’s one of them State Government Billy things that make it into actual law…and it did…and it went into lawful effect on July 1, 2012!  Now what this LAW states in “down home” terms is that before you and yours can get anymore fat, juicy government (taxpayer) checks, you gonna have to have your blood and/or pee pee checked for drugs.  Uh huh, you will!  Can you feel me laughin’ my butt off right now?  Well, I am!  You see, if you're going to live on my dime, then you don't get to smoke, you don’t get to drink, you can’t use illicit drugs, you can’t wear designer clothes, you don’t get a cell phone, no nail treatments, no expensive hairdos and you certainly cannot drive around in new shiny cars!  If you want any of that stuff, then get your lazy butt up and go to work!

Here is how this new LAW works:

1.  Get tested positive for illegal substances and you don’t get no more “assistance” checks for a year!

2.  Get tested positive for illegal substances for a second time and you don’t get no more “assistance” checks for three years!

So partners, if you get caught with drugs in your pee pee, well you had better have a rich uncle somewhere ‘cause your Government (taxpayer) teat done dried up!  No more juice sunshine!  In other words, get your rear end on the job or hit the bricks broke!  It’s gonna be all on you!  Gee, it makes me all tingly up in here!             

Yes siree Bobby Boy, ol’ Governor Rick Scott done punched a whole in your freeloadin’ bubbles!  Florida has taken the lead on this wagon train and the other states need to and should follow, at least, if the state reps want their jobs again!  Folks are getting’ sick of all the political correct hog wash!  We are at a breakin’ point as far as our hatred for current politicians goes!  You reps are sicko’s!  You wouldn’t know the “right thing” if someone hit you upside the head with it!  Yep the tide of things is beginning to turn and it’s about time!

Hey freeloaders!  IH-95 runs north from Florida!  Get sober, get clean or hit the road Jack!  Oh, and go way up north!  I doubt that Georgia or the Carolinas will put up with your sorry selves much longer either, especially if they get over-loaded with ya!  Do you ever get the feelin’ that you’re just not wanted?

http://www.myfloridahouse.gov/Sections/Documents/loaddoc.aspx?FileName=_h0353er.docx&DocumentType=Bill&BillNumber=0353&Session=2011

***************** - Obama, you insignificant lil' flea, you cannot defeat me! I am backed by a fella, who had spikes driven in both hands and feet, then he was hung on timbers and the only thing holding him up were those spikes, then he was stabbed and given up for dead, then he was entombed, then he walked out of that tomb and ascended up into the sky and after all of that he still lives today! Yes, this is my backing! What's yours? George Soros? I am laughing whole-heartedly right now! How small you really are Obama! Oh yeah, if you think this fella backing me is something, I just can't wait 'til you meet his father! Good luck, Hehehehehe!